Characters:
Boyfriend (Trent) – An obviously self-centered man, actor in one shampoo commercial which has given him a big head, all he talks about is the commercial, gets made fun of behind his back by Lenny (who can’t stand his ridiculousness)
German Guy
Wifi Repair Man (Vinny) – super Brooklyn, a big gut, second-generation Italian, “my great grandpa is coming over from the Old Country, he made pizza, my grandpa; he made pizza, my dad? PIZZA. Me? I repair wifi…” Patty: Wi-Fi? VINNY: And on the side I make pizza.
Karl
One of her bosses who fires her via phone maybe
Final Problem/Resolution:
Lenny explodes on Patty (who keeps losing jobs, getting in trouble, all because she feels like she has to take care of him like a mother), saying “You’re not my mother! Stop acting like one!” Patty is offended
Resolution: You will always be my big sister, I’ll be you’re little brother. We’ve got each other, that’s enough.
At the end of the show, Patty and Lenny are still fighting and they’re giving each other the silent treatment. They are both minding their own business when the door knocks. They both are confused on who it could be, but also John and Erin are confused at who it could be too. Patty opens the door to find a package.
Patty/Vinny Scene
Vinny busts through the door. He is a wifi repair man, second-generation Italian and proud of it. He repairs wifi, but makes pizza on the side… Just like his great-grandpa, grandpa, and dad…
VINNY: (Shouting…He is holding what appears to be a pizza box) Okay, where is it at?
PATTY: (Taken by surprise) What the?!... Who are you?!
VINNY: My name is Vincent Ferrari Di’Angelo Moretti Steinberg.
PATTY: (Looks at him confused… Steinberg??)
VINNY: I was the victim of a mixed marriage. My mama was Catholic, my daddy was Jewish. They ran away together when they were young, and boom, now I got 8 days of Christmas. I’m a fourth generation Italian.
PATTY: Okay, Mr. Pepperoni Dreidel, what are you doing here?
VINNY: Well, my Great-Grandpa started making pizza in the Old Country. And then my grandpa started making the pizza, and then my Mom and my dad took over and they make pizzas. And me? Well, I’m your wifi repair guy.
PATTY: You don’t make pizza?
VINNY: No… Okay I make it on the side…so where’s your router?
PATTY: Wait wait wait wait! I just ran around the whole block this morning! The wifi is out everywhere, not just right here!
VINNY: Yeah we know! Compu-Tech has sent their best repairmen in the company to find the source of the virus. So where’s your router?
PATTY: It’s on the desk. Look do we have to do this now? I’m kind of under a lot of stress and it’d be nice to have some time alone-
VINNY: Say no more! I know just what you need!
PATTY: Thank you! You can come back tomorrow-
VINNY: A song!
PATTY: Actually that’s the only thing I’ve had too much of today.
VINNY: Oh come on! Whenever I was feeling low as a kid, my ma and pops always knew exactly what to do.
Enter Jewish/Catholic Song with the accordion
Or wants to be an opera singer?