10 Commandments of aging
August 2000 Bluff Springs
Bummy Basketti
A rainy day. Frankly, I’ve never liked water. Years of swim lessons.. hated them all.. then.. girl at town creek. Lifeguard! Final test: three phases.. shallow water carry, save a fighting victim. … five laps of pool with clothes on… gradually took them off Jumped out of pool wearing only my skivvies. Local newspaper, the Pike Press, there that day. You are in, or about to enter, or will some day enter, this thing called Your Golden Years. It’s too hot for heavy, meaningful speeches.. Even President Clinton is on his third vacation of the month. I want to give you only one real piece of advice… If you want to stay afloat in this business of growing older, you’ve got to strip down to the essentials… drop the things that hold you back from truly enjoying what God has given you.. Jump out of the pool with your skivvies on.
As a result… My Ten Commandments For Aging with Style.
I can’t feature Charlton Heston coming down the mountain in his robe holding these. Think instead of Mel Gibson in cutoff jeans and holding beautifully wrapped present with your name on it. (And those of you who are still savoring the mental image of me standing beside the Pittsfield pool in wet skivvies… stop it!… You’ll miss the best part of my speech.
COMMANDMENT NUMBER ONE! Just when you think you’ve given all you have to give, Thou shalt Give More! I teach a generation of kids who need you very badly. -----Kidnap your grandkids from school and go for a picnic. They need you more than they need me. So what if you’re arrested? It’ll be a moment they’ll cherish forever. We often kidnap kids at camp.. 3 in the morning. You want to get depressed? Think about yourself. Want to feel great? Get involved with others. Albert Sweitzer… The only ones among you who will be truly happy in life are those who’ve sought and found out how to serve others. Just when you think you’ve given all you can give, Thou Shalt Give More!
COMMANDMENT #2 Thou shalt stop griping… Whoever said.. “Get it off your chest…” …… It brings you down and makes you a real pain to the rest of us. Charlie Rose… Johnstone.. nation’s leading architect as age 90. The hottest place in hell is reserved for gripers and complainers. “If life were 100 times longer, there would still be no excuse for getting bored.” USA Today.. interviewed a doctor who specialized in aging… “No matter what medicines I prescribe, those who complain less, live longer.”
COMMANDMENT #3: Thou Shalt Break The Dress Code…. (Not your employers, but your own personal…) Me.. no tie to church one day………. Jim Kern…… Mrs. Brown My Dad.. banker… bald… .Christmas tree on his head. This summer.... dress as a clown and drop his pants in front of hundreds of people. By the way, he’s 81.
I hate socks.. This is killing me today. Little lady in our Arenzville retirement home.. uses a cane.. always topped with the most gorgeous, fresh flower.
Thou Shalt Break Your Dress Code….
COMMANDMENT # 4: Thou Shalt be an Encourager! Marie….. salt and pepper shakers Develop friends who encourage you. This summer: I’ve hosted over 400 kids at camps, I’m doing five plays, July 31st was my one night off, Tomorrow I open a play at New Salem, and I’ve heard the nasty rumor that school’s going to start. I don’t need money, I don’t need a doctor or a carpenter or a dance teacher.. I simply need encouaragers.
COMMANDMENT #5: Thou Shalt not Take Yourself Too Seriously… Me: Chillocothe… Roger Ebert Bob Hope… Got out of hospital … age 97. Dr. said, “He left a day before we’d planned. The nurses said he was a terrible flirt and we had to get rid of him.”
COMMANDMENT # 6: Thou shalt turn your worry into prayer. New Book.. Don’t Sweat the Small stuff .. and It’s All Small Stuff. “When you die, your In Box won’t be empty.” You will NEVER get it all done. Billy Graham.. two ladies. And if you can’t stop, then make yourself a deal… for every minute worry: 1 min prayer. (If you’re an atheist, go hire a nice Baptist friend to pray for you. What’s it gonna hurt?)
Corrie Ten Boom; Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength.
Last Day of school last year. Travis.. drug trouble.. meeting with superintendent.. Dylan came in.. I want to talk about Travis.. I think we should pray for him. Tears in supt’s eyes. Turn your worry into prayer.
COMMANDMENT # 7: Thou Shalt Lighten up and live a little! Beardstown ladies… …. Sydney Australia.
COMMANDMENT # 8: Thou Shalt Cause a little trouble and get Rowdy.
PERRY: Pop Van Pelt… would go out into the back yard about ten o’clock at night and shoot off his shotgun. Town cop would go running down there. “Town’s too derned quiet.”
Good friend of mine in one of Jacksonville’s largest churches.. Would always attend the early service and sit up front. Shout “Amen!” Preacher: Could you restrain yourself a little? Friend: No. When I think of God I just get too excited.
COMMANDMENT # 9: THOU SHALT TAKE CHARGE OF THINE OWN MOODS. And not let the world do it for you. My great-grandmother’s diary… we found…Typical Day.. wash floors, milked then let the cows out to pasture, gathered the eggs.. then went upstairs and woke up the men for breakfast.” Every day: “This is just about the finest day ever.”
Mom… Alcatraz
COMMANDMENT #9 ½ : THOU SHALT EAT MORE ICE CREAM. You’ve earned it……..
COMMANDMENT 9.75 : THOU SHALT SPOIL THY ONLY BEGOTTEN GRANDCHILDREN. This is your job. It’s your God-given duty. ---Kids wouldn’t play at my house because of my dad. He’d whip you whether you belonged there or not! ….. Now.. he’ll drive any distance, sit through any concert, endure any JHS football score, just to watch a grandson. ---Parents are not supposed to have fun raising kids.. you are! Last Coonridge book…AROUND THE WORLD….Alaska, one of most favorite places. I was talking to our room steward.. both looking at a glacier..I was excited, he was tired. That’s because I was on vacation but he was doing his job. It was just like having grandkids. It’s your job to enjoy the glaciers.
COMMANDMENT # 10 Thou Shalt show the rest of us how to praise God! After all, you’re closer to heaven than some of us and you need to give us a taste of what it’s gonna be like. You have more stories of faith than any minister or Chicken Soup for the Soul book ever heard. ----Church lady
We sit around bemoaning the fact that our youth aren’t more involved in church, then hold church services that would depress a hyena.
G’pa Orr in Pentecostal Service.
END You are a precious, precious resource for your church and your community. These can and should be your most precious years. Lighten up! Shake it off! Cause some trouble! And jump out of the pool wearing only your skivvies! And God Bless You!
PAGE
PAGE 2