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Alsey Grade School Graduation

May 98

Me: Perry.. class of under 30… small grade school, small high school, small college, now teaching in a small school. I’m a believer! My cousin… put a washing machine motor on his bicycle.. rode back and forth to Culver Stockton College.. 60 miles… Then: Dean of Penn State University, head of Naval Research. He said that if he hadn’t gone to one of the smallest schools in the state, he’d never have done it. I’m a believer. My mother attended school in a one-room school house, went to college, then became my 3rd grade teacher… I’m a believer. Tonight she will call me when I get home and ask how my speech went. No matter how it goes, I will tell her it went well.

I suppose I should say something about the history of the Alsey school and what you’ve done to keep this wonderful place alive… But practically everyone in this room knows more about this than I do.. Instead, let me simply say congratulations… I admire what you’ve done so very much… Now let me speak to the children… those graduating and those still in attendance.

I went to Illinois College, a farm boy from one of the smallest high schools in the state. I hoped I could fake my way through and they’d never find out that I came from a small school. I was embarrassed to sit in class beside a suburban Chicago grad.. who had more in her class than I did in my entire town. Brought a friend home.. phonebook.. Perry? laughed.. No.. entire county..

Worst mistake of my life. I soon found out how far ahead of everyone I was because somebody had taught me how to work.. How to do my homework.. how to do my chores. THAT’S what paid off in college. Next week I’m getting an honorary doctorate degree and I’m still not very smart. I just know how to work. A small school taught me that.

Recently the state legislature passed a bill.. If you’re large enough, we’ll give you money to spend on your buildings. Lesson number one tonight: Just because you get elected to something, that doesn’t mean you’re smart.

I’m a believer in small schools.

Ok.. I’m old, I’m fat and I’m bald.. that means I’m really wise, so let me give you some really good advice.

  1. --- Be very careful whom you’re trying to please.. HINEY THE MULE

  2. --- Be great in math.. that will make you stand out.. Become a good writer… that will make you stand out… Know your history… not many people do and you’ll stand out… But if you truly want to make your mark in the world, learn how to be yourself. Just yourself. Find out who you are, what you’re good at, what you love.. This week.. one of my favorite authors.. Freida Marie Crump… Dance like nobody’s watching, and love like it’s never gonna hurt. In other words, LIVE like nobody’s watching and don’t be afraid to tell people that you love them and to show your love. I saw an amazing thing this week… 8th grade CA.. Ballet. 7th grade boy… piano competition… wanted to play but embarrassed.. he did.. the class is still talking about it. Small 7th-grader transferred in from Texas. Parents divorced. Quiet and shy. Went out for track. Last Wednesday broke the school record for the 100 yard dash. Last year’s Triopia seniors got together and wrote parents notes on the night of graduation. Dance like nobody’s watching and love like it’s never gonna hurt.

  3. Put your faith in God. I know this isn’t a religious school, but I can say what I want because I’ve got a fast car. Daniel.. Zebco 22.

  4. Spend life helping others instead of worrying about yourself and you’ll never have a bad day. Never. Becky Easley.

  5. Lighten up. The world is so darned serious. .. so ready to sue each other or to pick a fight. .. Lighten up… Go barefoot more often eat nothing but ice cream for an entire day tomorrow, wear your underwear backwards McDonnalds..”Have a Nice Day” Why? Ask the preacher to serve pizza at the next communion. Biggest grouch in your school “I Just want you to know that I feel great!” When you get into high school. Walk into a school board meeting.....Ask to be heard. Politely ask that the school spend as much to teach reading as they do basketball then walk out.

Matt: Baritone Jeff W... free spirit....robbed Walmart singer Church lady Roger Ebert

AND FINALLY: Take advantage of your small school education. You’ve probably been raised more strictly than your friends in other schools. That’s good. Someone has put up good strong fences called discipline to surround you. Stanford study

I congratulate you on graduating tonight.. I congratulate the entire Alsey community for fighting the good fight.

The saddest part of teaching is watching the interest in education dwindle. You folks encourage me… with your energy, your dedication, and your love for your children.

And I’d give the same bit of advice to the parents, grandparents, and friends… set an example in your lives as you have with the establishment of this school…. Dance like nobody’s watching, and love like it’s never gonna hurt.

I look forward to your 20th anniversary. Thank you.