JHS Seniors

April 24, 2008

JERAD JOHN KRISTIN CHELSEA

Music, then KRISTIN: Four scholarship applications and they’ve got to be done tonight!

CHELSEA: When I die, bury me in college applications.

JERAD: Today? It’s due today?

JOHN: Great. I’ve got that meeting before school, three tests today, another practice after school then that thing tonight…and my paper’s due tomorrow!

KRISTIN: Dear Open Line: Kids today have it too easy. All they do is sit around. (Music)

CHELSEA: Maybe if I go without sleep the rest of the year….

KRISTIN: How can you make so many mistakes in one day?!

JERAD: I get up early.

JOHN: Dear Open Line: They need to go out and get a job like I did. It’s no wonder the world’s in such bad shape. I think this is what causes Global Warming. (Music)

JERAD: Prom? Have you seen what a corsage costs? I wonder if she’d just settle for lettuce.

KRISTIN: I didn’t really flunk that class. I’m just “passing impaired.”

CHELSEA: Dear Open Line: If boys today would just pull their pants up then they might learn something.

KRISTIN: And what are you going to be when you get out of school?

JARED: An old man.

CHELSEA: I’m not kidding! She’s got the nerve to wear a dress just like mine to Prom! Just like mine! I’ll bet she heard what I was wearing and then went out and bought the very same dress! I cannot believe the nerve of that girl! KRISTIN: She bought hers first. CHELSEA: That doesn’t make any difference. It was a cheap shot. (Music)

JOHN: Dear Open Line: I think it says in the Bible somewhere that kids who skateboard will go to hell.

JERAD: I wanted to grow up to play basketball like Trevon Harris.

CHELSEA: I wanted to be able to sing like Carrie Griffeth.

JERAD: Instead I play basketball like Mr. Kennedy and sing like Mr. Wainscott.

JOHN: Uh…I’m sorry, but _____ won’t be at school today. CHELSEA: Who is this calling? JOHN: This is my mother. (Music)

KRISTIN: Mom, I know he’s a nice boy! Heck, he’s even doing 500 hours of community service!

CHELSEA: I think the only way you can change man is if he’s in diapers.

KRISTIN: Honest, Mr. Wainscott! My shorts aren’t too revealing! My middle finger is just too short!

CHELSEA: Okay, look…if a girl asks if you love her, the only good answer is yes. Here are some really bad answers… JOHN: a. I suppose so. JARED: b. That depends on what you mean by love. JOHN: c. Does it matter? JARED: Or d. Who? Me? (Music)

KRISTIN: And if she says, “Do you think that girl is prettier than me?” Here are the Incorrect responses: JOHN: a. Yes, but you have a better personality. JERAD: b. Not prettier, but definitely thinner. JOHN: Or C.. Uh…define pretty

CHELSEA: Dear Open Line, these stupid kids wantin’ to skateboard everywhere and do drugs. Why can’t they do like my old man…just get drunk and beat the crap out of me? I turned out okay!

JERAD: Hey! I don’t think I deserve a zero on this test! KRISTIN: I agree, but that’s the lowest grade I could give you.

CHELSEA: Please listen to this morning’s announcements. This year’s prom, Midnight in Murrayville, will cost $35. The senior graduation announcement package lists at $125. The Crimson T-shirts are ten dollars. FFA is selling the JHS School Crest Keepsake Ornaments for ten dollars. The premium senior picture package is $321. Your camp and gown will cost $41. Loan officers from the Farmer’s National Bank will be in the front hallway during lunch hour.

KRISTIN: All seniors wishing to sell their cars to pay for graduation expenses should meet with representatives of Jacksonville Auto Mart after school.

JOHN: Dear Open Line, I’m tired of payin’ more money for education down at the high school. I didn’t have no fancy computers and IPod machines when I growed up and it didn’t affect me none neither. (Music)

CHELSEA: Dear Open Line, I overheard three JHS seniors at McDonalds talking about taking SAT’s. Is that a drug?

JERAD: Your attention please. Due to budget cuts, Mr. HYPERLINK "http://morgan.k12.il.us/jvsd117/Chelsvig_Norway_Journal.html" Chelsvig’s annual summer educational trip will be to Roodhouse.

KRISTIN: Mrs. Nelson has asked me to make the following announcement: Freitagvormittag war unser erster richtiger Schultag. JOHN: Uh...Gesunteit?

CHELSEA: Today’s menu is Pizza, tiny triangles, and ketchup. And for a special treat, we’re adding corn!

KRISTIN: Dear Open Line, the traffic getting into JHS this morning was awful. A lady had a baby waiting for the light to change and she wasn’t even pregnant when she left home. (Music)

JOHN: You missed school yesterday, didn’t you? JARED: Not very much.

CHELSEA: Dear Mom and Dad… It’s been great being your daughter but I’m leaving home tonight. ..

JARED: It’s been great being your son, but I’m taking a pair of clean underwear and sneaking out… (Music UNDER this……..) KRISTIN:…I signed up for college today and they wanted to know my major. …. JOHN:…The guidance counselor said I need to plan for the size of family I want to have. … CHELSEA: …My English teacher wants me to write a paper on my future goals and dreams…. JARED: …Under future plans I wrote, “How should I know? I’m confused!”… KRISTIN:…I’m not ready to make any of these decisions yet, so I’m signing up for the Peace Corps in Uganda …. CHELSEA:…I’m joining the Salvation Army in Bosnia…. JOHN:…I’m joining a circus in Pakistan…. JARED:...I’m becoming a nun… JOHN: It’s just for a couple of years. Don’t worry. I fed the dog before I left.

KRISTIN: Dear Open Line. I wish I was a senior in high school again. The kids have it so easy. Music…

Seniors..Australia..missed last two days. You’ve got how many days left? A real temptation to think of summer..getting out..college.. a place of your own. These are precious days ahead of you…don’t waste the present by worrying about the future. And don’t let the stress of the end of school take away your joy.

Use these few remaining days… Three pieces of advice:

Get your act together. 2. Get to know each other. 3. Don’t forget to live.
Get your act together…I was senior class sponsor for 18 years. I know the load of things you’re going to have coming at you in the next few weeks…2 kinds: the kind you expect and the kind you don’t. Those you expect: getter done. Do them on time. Do them early. Don’t cheat yourself out of the really fun stuff because you’re busy playing catch-up. You can’t please everybody in the next few weeks… Sort it out. HINEY THE MULE

2.Get to know each other…& Be yourself You’re about to graduate with some people who you don’t know. Watch… you’ve got a lot in common… Who used to take one step into bed…cover all but breathing hole? Get your mind off yourself… JHS girl.. CFS. Becky…funeral… How many days ‘til graduation? ___ You’ve got that many days to get to know the people in this room. You wanna be miserable? Think about yourself. You wanna be happy today? Get involved in somebody’s else life.. be concerned about them..get to know them.

Be Yourself … Quest...Inner-Outer Self

architect Johnstone: (Charlie Rose show) 90 years old. Hottest place in hell for whiners and complainers ..... “If life were 100 times longer, there would still excuse for every getting bored by it.”

Don’t Forget to Live…. IN THE PRESENT …even while I’m speaking… Heather Baccus…. Lighten up.... Matt…baritone

LIGHTEN UP.... ....go barefoot more often ....Invite some friends over who you usually don’t hang around and bring your elementary school pictures..then laugh your butts off. ...eat nothing but ice cream for a whole day. ...wear underwear backwards...will break into uncontrollable giggles for no reason every time you think about it. ....walk up to biggest grouch you know and say “I just want you to know that I feel great!” It’ll throw them off all day. ...do some serious coloring ...plan a hiking trip down the Mauvaisterre Creek …Kids used to go up town and sit on the statue in the middle of the square.. Go Re-tro. Do it again! … Meet at Nichol’s park and play every dumb game you ever played when you were a kid. ...break the dress code occasionally. Your own, not the schools. …make yourself a deal…one new senior.. “You’re in my class. Who in the heck are you?” .....McDonnald’s “Have a nice Day” Why? Live in the Present

3 things in life are real...WHEN YOU’RE BORN, WHEN YOU DIE WHEN YOU MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN ANOTHER PERSON’S LIFE in everything else...LIGHTEN UP.

Get your act together. 2. Get to know each other. 3. Don’t forget to live.

Chillochothe...”probably dead” Church lady...music at her funeral. Jeff W...Free Spirit..Robbed and tied. Travel LIghter...Your anxieties? Look in your purse or pocket or billfold...ME: comb. Roger Ebert. One final bit of graduation advice… Triopia graduation…seniors wrote notes.

Despite what you hear on CNN tonight..the world really is a pretty cool place. Welcome to it.

JHS Senior Thing..April 23rd

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