← Speeches & Workshops

October 2012

Sangamon County Jr High Schoolmasters, Leadership Conf

That was great. . .sounded like my funeral.

Chillochothe…famous author’s day.. “Probably dead” Beginning a speech: Bummy Communicating: David. .basketti

Somebody picked you to come here today because they thought you were pretty good….a leader. That’s a great honor. … But there’s something they may not have told you. You’re going to have to give something back. You got a day out of school, some nice music and lunch and great kids from other schools, but it’s a trick…We want something more from you than what you’re getting today. Sorry, but you have no choice… Because of your talent, and your ability, you’re going to have to give back more than you get here today.

Okay..now’s the chance for any of you to walk out the door. I know, you can’t drive, but there’s real cool _____ out in the lobby.

You’re going to have to become a leader. This is not an option. We need you …quick. And I don’t mean you’re going to have to be a leader when you grow up some day, I mean today…I mean next Monday when you go back to school.

Brandon is a six-foot-one seventh grader at a school where I teach…Triopia. He’s muscular. You don’t mess with Brandon. He’s also one of the smartest kids in his class. Jason is a round little 7th-grader in the same school. Jason is not very athletic and he’s sort of a pest so he doesn’t have many friends.

Two days ago I took their entire 8th-grade class on an Old Fashioned School Day. Dressed like grandparents, packed food…. Climbed a hill prairie to see what Illinois looked like 200 years ago… Hiked through an old cemetery taking grave rubbings… Hunted in a creek for geodes…. Traveled to a one-room school house…outdoor toilet…two-holer: could take a friend Finally: went fishing in a large pond. Kids spread all the way around the pond… Jason was a terrible fisherman. He kept getting his line in the trees and he kept jabbering and the kids started to tease him. Jason’s feelings were hurt. They moved away from him. The other kids were catching fish and Jason was catching maple leaves and tree limbs. Nobody wanted to fish with Jason.

Big, tall Brandon saw what was happening. He walked over and climbed the tree to get Jason’s hook out of the branches, fixed his pole, and sat down and fished with him…talked with him. Brandon is not a politician…he’s not a general in the army…he’s not the principal of any school…He’s a seventh-grader and he’s the finest leader I’ve seen all week.

Brandon’s not a leader because he’s six foot one and smart. He’s a leader simply because he had the nerve to do the right thing. I promise you that if I return to that school six years from today when he’s a senior, Brandon will be the school’s finest leader. Not because he’s big and smart, but because he has the guts to do what’s right.

Okay, you say “I’m not ready.” Too bad. …I’ll help you.. a few tips.

I’ve taught Middle School for 40 years and I’ve met lots and lots of Brandon’s.

Here’s what I’ve learned by watching all these student leaders.

1. They don’t whine. Finished a play Saturday night.. Courtney: pretty, talented, actress, singer. But DO NOT ask Courtney how her day has been. She will tell you. And tell you.. and tell you. When the other kids see her coming to rehearsal they hide. Courtney never makes a mistake. It’s always someone else’s fault.

There’s an old saying: “Get it off your chest.” My advice: Don’t. It makes you a pain in the butt to the rest of us… and it brings you down.

It can happen to teachers, too. ..meet her in IGA...guess what she talks about...

Corrie Ten Boom was a young girl from the Netherlands. She and her father helped many Jews escape from the Nazis in WWII. Her whole family was arrested and her father died 10 days later. Corrie and her sister Betsie were sent to a concentration camp where her sister died.

“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, It empties today of its strength.” Despite everything that happened to her, she didn’t think backwards. She didn’t whine or complain. She knew that WORRY is a waste of time.

Let’s play a little game…I’ll give you two minutes to sit and worry about everything you’re nervous about. Okay, I won’t. But at the end of the two minutes will have solved anything?

The best Middle School leaders I’ve known, play their own little game: They make two stacks: 1) These are the things I can fix, so I’ll fix them and I won’t have to worry about them. 2) These are the things I can’t fix. I’ll live with them.

Stop doing morning calesthenics Yesterday is gone…realize the mistakes you made, tell yourself you won’t do it again, then get on with it. There’s way too much happening today to think about yesterday.

Why? Because Monday morning at school we need you at your best! Your school depends on you to be a leader. You may not go fishing with your class, but there are dozens of Jason’s out there who need a friend.

2. The best student leaders I know, don’t let other people decide their happiness.

The best leaders don’t let other people decide how their day is going to go. Yes, somebody else put you on a bus today. Yes, somebody else chose you to come here…but the really important things about today, YOU are going to decide…Whether you pay attention…Whether you learn something…Whether you make some new friends…YOU are in charge of everything important.

My dad…spanking brother Keith..Keith kept laughing.. finally Dad started laughing and dropped him. (Of course, Keith started crying then.)

As a leader, you’re going to have to put up with people who really irritate you. Do it. You probably can’t change them. You can change how YOU REACT to them.

Who are you? Are you who your friends say you are?

3. The best student leaders I know are ridiculously busy…and that’s okay. Do you have a crazy schedule? Seem like your family ever eats a meal together. Does your mom say things like, “We’re just going to have to slow down!” Does your Dad say, “It seems like we’re gone every night?”

No offense to your Mom, but it won’t work. No offense to Day, but Yes, your family will be gone about every night… sports, music, speech, dance, clubs, church groups…That’s the price you pay for being a leader.

Because if you’re a leader… The only times you’re going to be truly happy in your life are when you’re doing things to help others….If you get tired of giving, give more. You only have about 80 more years of this then you can quit

My guess: You each are one of the busiest students in your school…STILL…when somebody in your school wants something done, they come to you. 90% of the work in the world is done by people who don’t have time to do it.

Giving of yourself is good… It makes me happy. It will make YOU happy.

It’s a simple formula: Spend most of your time thinking about yourself and you’ll get depressed. Spend most of your time thinking about others, you’ll be happier. Becky...funeral... Carl Menninger JHS girl: CFS

Brian … clown day. For the first time in his life, he was forced to think about somebody else.

A. Sweitzer: “The only ones among you who will be truly happy as those who will have sought and found out how to serve.”

If you’re getting really tired of working hard for others, the only cure is to work harder for others. You’ll go to bed every night really tired, really worn out, and really, really happy.

4. The best student leaders I know, have found a great secret: They know how to pick their friends.

My elementary school friends…all alphabetical. As you grow older you’ll be in charge of picking your own friends. My advice if you want to be a leader: pick friends who encourage you.

Who take joy in your joy. Lots of your friends will cry with you when you’re sad. But those who are truly happy when you’re successful…those are the ones to cling to. Your best friends are seldom jealous of you…they are happy for you.

Play this game in your head…there’s something you want very, very badly.. some sort of honor…a place on the team, a part in the play, an honor at school..They announce the winner and it’s your very best friend. Now STOP! Right now…at this moment, your friendship is in danger. Is it okay to be disappointed? Sure! I would be, too. But can you also convince yourself that you’re happy for them? If you can, then you have a friendship that’ll last forever.

Collect interesting and enthusiastic people. Marie...salt and pepper shakers.

Tony Compello “Five years from now you’ll be pretty much the same as you are now except for two things: The books you’ve read and the people you’ve met.

And the best way to do this is to become an encourager yourself. My schedule… I’m rehearsing three plays at once. I teach at Lincoln Land…. Must leave here and drive 3 hours to play piano tonight then drive to Peoria to play on the Riverboat. Tomorrow I teach class then run to a retirement home to do a show, then another class and I have six newspaper columns to write this week and prepare for a trip to Alaska and four summer camps. Do I need your help? No. What do I need? Encouragers! I just need someone to say, “Yeah. You can do this, Ken!”

And how do you find friends who encourage you? You become and encourager yourself and they’ll find you.

5. Because you are talented and smart, you are really busy. My advice: Don’t get so busy with the important things in your life that you forget the important things in your life.

James Dobson..monopoly Dad...hay ...rain....

You are going to have lots and lots of choices in the next few years. You can handle them…you can’t say yes to everything. Sit down with your parents and decide which ones are best for you…and pick the really important ones.

6. Why do you do what you do? To please people. Some of those people are sitting with you right now. If you’re going to be a leader, choose carefully whom you try to please.

Quest...Inner-Outer Self

HINEY THE MULE

People who want the very best for you…YES, try to please them.

7. The greatest student leaders I know are pretty funny people. They know how to laugh.

Matt…baritone

Sometimes the best solution to a problem is to laugh.

Jim Kern...MRS. BROWN

LIGHTEN UP.... ....go barefoot more often ....turn off the TV & computer some night and have a family joke time. ...eat nothing but ice cream for a whole day. ...wear underwear backwards...will break into uncontrollable giggles for no reason every time you think about it. ....walk up to biggest grouch you know and say “I just want you to know that I feel great!” It’ll throw them off all day. ...do some serious coloring ...break the dress code occasionally. Your own, not the schools. You know the definition of fashion? Whatever makes you feel GREAT. My last year’s senior class: Boys. Prom. Goodwill store. Most expensive suit: $23…and that came with a vest. .....McDonnald’s “Have a nice Day” Why? …Pick out somebody who really bothers you and simply be nice to them. Camper: kidnap.

You’re a leader. Followers are nice to people who are nice to them. Leaders try to make everyone feel good about who they are. Get really interested in other people. Me: trapped in closet with Mr. Rogers.

3 things in life are real...WHEN YOU’RE BORN, WHEN YOU DIE WHEN YOU MAKE SOMEBODY’S LIFE HAPPIER in everything else...LIGHTEN UP.

8. Don’t take yourself too seriously.. chances are, no one else does.

Church lady...music at her funeral.

Jeff W...Free Spirit..Robbed and tied.

Roger Ebert.

9. The best leaders live in the PRESENT…not the past or the future.

Your parents say “Think ahead! Think ahead!” Your teachers say, “Look to the future! Plan! Think ahead!” The good leader does this, but he or she also says… “Whoa.. wait a minute. I’m thinking ahead so much that I forgot to enjoy where I am!” Never again in your life will you sit in a room with this group of people. Never again in your life will you hear what you’re going to hear today. Look around…some of these people you’ll never see again. Think about where you are…appreciate who you are and who you’re with.

Some of you during my speech have been thinking about how long...., tomorrow, this weekend. When you drive home from school today, enjoy the moment you’re in.

Show at New Salem one night.. turn out the lights and look at the moon.

Lives of American kids are so filled with “things” that we seldom leave time to enjoy where we are and what we’re doing.

10.. The hardest thing on the list I’ve given you today. Be Yourself A few years ago they invented this thing where you could be anybody you want to be…You can pretend to be somebody else….You can lie about who you are and what you think and lots of people will believe it. It’s called Facebook. Oh…lots of good things about Facebook….but Truthfulness isn’t one of them. They now have photo programs where you can make yourself thinner and prettiers and more handsome on your profile picture. Nothing sinful about that, but guess what? I want to know YOU. (pick someone out) You’ve impressed me with the way you’ve been listening today.. Tell me about yourself….

I just learned more than any Facebook page could tell me.

Let me be really, really honest. If you’re being honored here today, then you’re probably going to live a lot longer than the people who brought you. … even me, as young as I look. It’s going to be YOU running things very quickly.

Why am I giving this speech today? I mean, the ____ was good, but…

My grandpa had a clock. He bought it during the Depression.. When he died he had a choice of giving it to one of his three children. He gave it to my Dad. My dad’s still alive, but he wanted to give it to one of his sons to take care of. He gave it to me. And some day, I’ll pass it along to someone else. We’re about to give you our world and we don’t want to give it to a bunch of idiots and ying-yangs. So…here today.. we’ve chosen you.

Once upon a time your grandparents looked at your mother and father when they were your age and hoped that they would become leaders and bring something wonderful to the world. They did…It’s you. Now let’s take that ball and run with it. I told you...This may seem like an honor and it is…but we’re asking more from you than we’re giving you today.

One final thing…if you do all this… If you want to be a leader because you care about people…If you think more about other people than you think about yourself… If a little unpopular kid getting his fishing line tangled in a tree tugs at your heart… If you convince yourself to stop worrying so much and just enjoy what you’re doing at the moment….If you pick friends who encourage you, and if you learn how to just laugh when things to wrong… If you do all this….You’re gonna love it.

You’ve all had personal heroes…older kids that you’ve looked up to. Do you realize that younger kids are looking at you right now? It’s really pretty cool.

Why does Auburn, Ball Chatham, New Berlin, Pawnee, Pleasant Plains, Riverton, Rochester, Tri-City and Williamsville go through this? It cost money. It disrupts their school schedule. It takes time… One simple reason: They NEED YOU. Our state government wants us to give thousands of tests to make schools better and NONE OF THEM will make as much difference in your school as great student leaders.

John…slam dunk champ of Central Ill, star fullback…Isaac…ketchup. Down’s Syndrome cousin. Isaac always in trouble in elementary school…would do whatever the other kids told him to do. Kicked off bus. John asked to visit and sit in back. “Isaac! Ketchup!” On the night of John’s graduation last spring, they called his name to come get his diploma…and from behind the curtains came a little boy giving him a bottle of ketchup.

I hope you guys and girls have a great day… Because starting tomorrow, you’ve got to lead.

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